Adventures in Unemployment: Day 1

So, I have been on hiatus for a while between gallivanting across the country and getting settled back into life here in Memphis. But now comes perhaps the most important series of posts in the history of blogging—or at least in my history of blogging, which isn’t very long. I am going to begin blogging my way through unemployment. It’s been a solid 4 months now since I graduated college and while some of that time was filled with trips and odd jobs and just taking a break in general, I remain unemployed. Hopefully this series won’t be too long because I can’t afford for it to be, but in any case, welcome to my world—the thoughts, the observations, and the interesting stage of life that is unemployment.

Day #1: Networking.

So, people always tell you that networking is the way to go—that’s how you get jobs. You’ve got to know somebody somewhere who knows somebody else who has an uncle whose best friend who works for Human Resources at FedEx or Starbucks or whatever company you want to work for. In fact, my alma mater (which is a great school, even though I’m about to make it sound ridiculous) used to put out these little leaflets around school that said something to the effect of: “Networking, one letter away from Not-working.”

While this is incredibly cheesy, it is also completely untrue. I mean I know a few people, a very few, who got jobs in sort of a passive way through their parents or whatever. Sure, that kind of networking is one letter away from “not-working,” but for the rest of us networking is just working without the net (My school totally should have hired me for that campaign instead). You have to be willing to put yourself out there to meet people several times over before you actually get to anything really concrete. But the crazy thing is—it works. I would say at least 95% of my friends that graduated that actually do have jobs now got them through someone they knew or met somewhere. It’s amazing how high school comes back to you after college. It’s all about whom you know and how they feel about you. But regardless all of that is still

Maybe it’s also “not-working” for people who already have a lot of contacts, who spent their college career going to job fairs and “networking nights,” or who have well connected parents or family friends. But what about the people who, like me, move to a city after graduation simply because they like it, or because they have friends there, but have no real contacts? I think this would have been much less of a problem if the economy was better, but I’m not sure. This is the only job market I’ve ever known, and so far it sucks. Here are of couple things I’ve learned about networking without a network so far in my job search:

1. Don’t use the Internet for anything, ever. This may sound extreme, but it’s kind of true. I’ve applied for countless jobs online since I’ve been in Memphis, but I’ve only heard back from three. The first one I heard back from resulted in the preceding post, “The Interview Story.” The second one emailed me back to tell me the position had been filled, and the third told me that I didn’t have the right credentials for the position I applied for. Sending applications out via the Internet is just about as likely to get you a job as going up on your roof, making paper airplanes out of your resume, and chucking them off. While there is definitely a chance something really great could happen to your resume out there on the wind, the most likely possibility is that it will end up floating upside-down in a gutter somewhere.

2. I’m not mad at the Internet. Sure I could go on complaining about how ridiculous some of the things I’ve applied for are, and how there are so many jobs I should have heard back from, but I think there’s a reason the internet is not the place to look for jobs. It’s too easy. What kind of weird world would we live in if all you had to do was click a submit button on a job search website and (poof!) you had a job? It’s way too easy. There’s still a very human element to the whole hiring process, and the Internet, at times, makes it nigh impossible to display that humanity to a potential employer. I think critics who talk about how technology is ruining our society should try being unemployed for a while. In a job search, technology actually helps you strengthen the social bonds you need to start building a network. Yeah, it’s great for letting you know what’s available out there too, but the ability it gives you to communicate with mass amounts of people quickly is what is really invaluable. Today it allowed me to contact a friend in Seattle who might know someone in Memphis who could get me a job. This is a great thing and a terrible thing, because just as quickly as you can contact people they can throw your email away and never see it again.

3. It’s all about the face to face. This is not a surprise to anyone who has ever gotten a job probably, but something I’ve decided on doing from now on in my job search is actually visiting the offices of the places I want to work. Not only does it show initiative on your part, but it puts a face with the name, and it’s so much harder to not respond to someone when they’re standing right in front of you. The downside of this is, of course, that it’s kind of awkward. I can already imagine a lot of weight shifting, stuttering, and sweaty-palmedness on my part. I haven’t actually tried this yet, but expect a post on my first tenuous foray into the world of face to face job searching. Regardless though, I feel like this is the way to go. There is something about being there that all the best cover letters in the world can’t make up for.

4. The longer you go without a job, the harder it is. A great truth of the world is: the more time each day you spend in your underwear, the less likely you are to actually do something positive. Sometimes I feel like the member of a bad sitcom in my apartment. I’m the one that’s always around in various stages of unkemptness—think Owen Wilson in “You, Me, and Dupree.” This goes back to the whole the internet is too easy thing. Any job you can apply for and get in your underwear should not be a real job, and probably isn’t (take that Google Ad sellers). So lately my goal has been to get out of bed at a time when most normal people get out of bed and to eat breakfast and take a shower at a reasonable interval of time after that. It sounds kind of simple, but you would be amazed how much less likely you are to sit around and watch movies or look at Facebook when you’re actually showered and ready for the day.

These are all the things I’m learning as an unemployed person. It’s a much different and more frightening education than any I ever received in college (this may also have to do with the fact that I was an English major). I know there is a job out there for me somewhere, and I am determined to find it, but for now all I can do is try to find leads, to build connections and from that hopefully find something real, where I can use my talents for good and not evil. So, as I send this out into the cosmic void of internet readership, let me just say that if anybody has any ideas for me, I’d love to hear them and even if you don’t have ideas but you know people, I would love to meet them. Until tomorrow, friends.

UPDATE for Day 1:

This is why I hate the Internet. I was directed to this site after filling out an application to be a trailer unloader--I got the posting off of the Memphis Flyer and thought I would apply just out of curiosity. I had no idea I was in for a VIP ticket: http://www.teleprofitsnow.com/moms/success.aspx?call=9/8/2009%208:00:00%20PM